For those who don’t understand:
I know the quality of this is going to be bad, but bear with me, as I’ve never done anything like this before. I want to try it out, see if it’s good.
I’ll try not to “um” and “eh” too much at ya, okay?
What I wanted to talk about, what time, and the value of time. The value of the things that you do in that time. Not just in school and in work, but in achievements, personal ones, and the things that you do to pass said time.
When I go to bed at night, I often find myself fretting a bit over having wasted time when I could be doing things, that say “actually matter”.
If you are no stranger to my blog here on wordpress, then you know that for the last few years I have not being going to school, nor working, as a result of my Asperger’s Syndrome and social anxiety. Instead, I have spent a lot of time playing massive online multiplayer games.
What I frett about the most is that games… achievements… leveling up. They have no relevance in the real world. Sure, they are a personal achievement, but if you put “I have a level 85 Death Knight, and a level 85 Priest, and I was the best discipline healer in my guild”, then they are going to turn you down right way. That is not the type of achievement that they are looking for in potential employees.
So would that make it a waste of time? If you are just playing games to pass the days you sit at home, while you could be volunteering, or doing something else that would actually help you in your future? Is personal enjoyment, personal achievements like hitting the level cap really worth the time you spend on them?
I play games to avoid being idle. To avoid being lonely. Of course, I could be doing endless amounts of chores, doing housework, even writing a book. But ever since I started staying at home so much, my will to write has dwindled. Would it be better if I forced myself to do so, even if I was miserable.
I don’t think so.
I’m not sure if playing games is worth my time. But I know that it keeps me from going insane. This is why I feel so bad when my father, or my family, lectures me about going to school. Because, I want to. I want to go to school, I want to work, I want to learn. That is something that they don’t comprehend. They know what it is like to hate school, but they don’t know what it is like to yearn for it. I understand that teenagers are supposed to go to school, for their future. Which is why I think that this topic is almost always in the back of my mind.
My conclusion, at this moment, is that time is wasted only if the person thinks it is wasted. Afterall, you are the one who makes the decision, and runs their own life. So if time is wasted, then it is obviously the fault of the person who made the decision to waste it. I know this is a rather… *pause* well, it’s not really the best of conclusions. I still waver between taking responsibility for choices, and working out the situation in a way that is acceptable and not depressing.